Tips for Navigating Being Gluten Free in Social Situations
I often think that being gluten free in social situations is the hardest thing about the gluten free diet. Even harder than giving up gluten itself!
Not only do social situations often feel like a GF-safety gamble, but you’re also often forced to watch delicious gluten food be eaten right in front of you.
On top of that, you will undoubtedly also be explaining your diet to at least one person, whether it just be a Server or a whole room full of family or friends. Fun, huh?!
Well, it actually can be fun! You just need to be prepared, confident, and follow these helpful key strategies that I’ve developed in the last 20 years since my celiac diagnosis that have helped me be happy and gluten free in social situations.
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Key Strategies and Insights for Safely Eating Gluten Free in Social Situations
The Early Bird Catches the Worm
Get in on the Planning Level! So much of successfully handling social situations as a gluten free person has to do with getting in early on plans. Start thinking about holidays and events ahead of time and contact the people in your group who usually do the planning. Either offer to take charge or strongly suggest some ideas for restaurants/meals that everyone would enjoy and that also have safe gluten free options.
Research Ahead of Time! Utilize Google and Facebook Groups
Know what you’ll be walking into. If you are not lucky or timely enough to help choose the location for a social gathering, then use Google and local gluten free Facebook groups to research a restaurant to see if it has any safe options for you.
Also, call the restaurant. The knowledge, confidence, and friendliness that the person answering the phone exhibits when answering questions about the restaurant’s gluten free offerings can be very telling. You’ll be able to tell what might be safe for you or if you might just have to eat a meal before the event.
Bring Enough to Share (But Also Protect that Dish with Your Life!)
Introduce people to GF things! I feel like the vast majority of the time people will really enjoy the gluten free food you bring and they’ll say “Wow, I would have never have known!”
It’s a win win all around. They’ll experience a bit of your life, and in doing so, become more understanding of what a gluten free diet can encompass! Education is soo important for all of our safety.
Though sharing is nice, it’s important to minimize the chances of someone cross-contaminating your dish. Read how under Celebrating Holidays with Home Cooking at Family Member’s/Friend’s House, below.
To Eat or Not Eat Your Relative’s or Friend’s “Gluten Free” Food? That is the Question
It often seems that family/friends want and will offer to contribute gluten free dishes, but it’s ok to wonder and question if it will be safe. You are justified in feeling concerned about whether or not the person has the knowledge of gluten free ingredients and appropriate kitchen environment to minimize cross contamination.
You can either take a hard stance on this and not accept food from anyone else, or consider the safety of other people’s “gluten free” food on a case by case basis.
Get Used to Bringing Snacks with You EVERYWHERE
Be prepared for anything and don’t get left hangry. I always have at least 2-3 different gluten free snacks in my purse, just in case! You never know when options may be less appealing or safe than you anticipated.
Thrive Market has such a wide assortment of GF snacks. They have the popular gluten free things like alllll the varieties of Simple Mills Crackers, but so many other great on-the-go snacks I’ve never seen anywhere else. Check out my post on Thrive Market to learn more about the GF options, and access links to special gifts and discounts when joining today.
It’s always good to have something to tide you over. This way, you can still have a good time socializing, and then pick up what you really wanted to eat from a restaurant you trust or make something yummy when you get home.
Be Your Own Health Advocate
Explain your needs with confidence. Usually you’ll have to do this multiple times in one outing. But, it’s going to be ok. Some good phrases to use may be…
- “I have to be really safe about what I eat. A crumb could make me sick for weeks.”
- “It looks delicious, but I’ve learned the hard way that risks are not worth it when I can get so sick”
- “I don’t want anyone to go out of their way for me. But I did find some restaurants that everyone will enjoy, regardless if you’re gluten free or not.”
- “Everything looks delicious, but I need to stick to the food I brought just to be on the safe side. Would you like to try some?”
- “Do you care if I go first? I know people worked to make these dishes gluten free so I can eat some. I’d hate for it to touch gluten on people’s plates as they move down the line.”
- “That looks great, but it’s something I’m not familiar with. I’ll just play it safe and eat what I brought instead.”
What other good one liners can you think of to protect yourself in social situations?
Handling Different Types of Social Situations When Gluten Free
Dinner with Friends/Family at Restaurants
This one can either be a lot of fun, or well…not so fun. You either need to be the Planner or get in good with the Planner. Do your research with Google and gluten free Facebook groups to find a few safe GF restaurant options that everyone will love, and then initiate lunch/brunch/dinner plans by throwing your restaurants out to the group as some truely EXCELLENT choices.
It seems to me that restaurants which offer high-quality gluten free food also offer high-quality food that people not on a GF diet will love as well. A great restaurant is a great restaurant. You just need to find the ones that please everyone that also maintain a great reputation for safe GF offerings. It can be done.
Celebrating Holidays with Home Cooking at Family Member’s/Friend’s House
As discussed above under Strategies, bringing your own gluten free dish to a get-together at someone’s house is a must. This way you have something to fill up on if there’s nothing else you can eat there.
Contact the host of a party to let them know you’ll be bringing something GF for yourself.
It’s also nice to share your dish, but make sure you protect that thing with your life to prevent cross contamination!
Just a few tips for sharing your gluten free dish with a crowd…
Don’t leave your dish sitting out with the other food until it’s time for you to eat it. Maybe put it in the front of the buffet line, so it’s the first food people touch to prevent cross contamination. Ask the hostess for a separate serving utensil or bring your own.
You could bring a little notecard saying “GLUTEN FREE, do not mix utensils!”, “WARNING, do not let utensil touch gluten food on your plate! Or you’ll have HELL to pay.” Make it funny or cute!
And for heaven sake, make sure YOU get the first helping out of your dish. Get your plate ready, put your dish in the front of the buffet line, then get two big scoops before anyone else touches it. Don’t let your special dish sit there unattended before you get some and give a random aloof family member the chance to cross contaminate it.
Keep your casseroles and other dishes warm and hidden from others til it’s time to eat with one of these insulated and expandable double casserole thermal bags. It can fit just one, or expand to fit two 11×15 casserole dishes. It also has an extra top pocket for storing your GF safe utensils!
If you have the means, space, and energy to host at your house, this could be a great option for ensuring the prevention of cross contamination. See more below!
Hosting a Get-Together
Have ultimate control over the situation! When you host an event, not only do you have more control over the menu, but you have ultimate control over the space as well. You can make all the gluten free things that take some knowledge of the diet to make safely, and delegate the easy to make gluten free things that you can trust other people with, or things that don’t need to be made at all (napkins, cups, could pick up pre-made GF dessert from trusted GF bakery near them, chips & salsa, etc.).
Need Some Gluten Free Catering?
I’ve got you covered! I wrote a blog post on this exact topic. There are more places out there that handle gluten free catering than you might suspect—some pretty delicious and safe ones too!
Kids’ Parties
Neither of my kids have been diagnosed with Celiac, but I still clearly remember what it was like being a GF kid back in the 90s.
I remember my friends being super interested in what I was eating. Not in a bad way, I wasn’t embarrassed or anything. They were just curious and they always wanted to try it. I usually only had an individual portion for me—good GF stuff was so hard to come by back then. But wouldn’t it be wonderful for the GF kid to share their experience with all their friends and feel included with the group as they all enjoyed a delicious dessert that also happened to be gluten free? Ask the host if you can bring a little GF treat to share with the group so that everyone can feel included. It may perhaps lessen her/his load as well.
Traveling / Renting House with Others on Vacation
This can be a nerve racking one. If one meal can be tough, try sharing a potentially cross contaminated environment for multiple days…But, don’t panic! There are ways to get through this.
- Think about what you’ll need to bring from home. A toaster? Air fryer? Perhaps a small pan for eggs? Assume anything that can have gluten particles hiding it in in the house you are renting will have gluten particles hiding in it (e.g. pots and pans, wooden utensils, toaster, etc.)
- Label your stuff! “Kyle’s Gluten Free Butter, Don’t Touch! :)” “Gluten Free Toaster – For Gluten Free Bread ONLY”, “Gluten Free Peanut Butter – Hands Off!”. I’m pretty sure you can have fun with this.
- Put your stuff away/hide from others when it’s not being used.
- Make your food away from crumbs on services/wipe counter tops before preparing food.
- Let your fellow vacationers know that you definitely don’t want to inconvenience anyone, but a single crumb will make you sick for your whole trip! You can coexist, but precautions need to be taken. That’s that.
What do you think? What are some lessons you have learned in navigating social situations while living your best gluten free life?
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